Saturday, June 16, 2012

Homework for the masses

This morning I tried really hard to come up with something to be disgruntled about. I nearly wrote a scathing critisism about social media that failed to congeal into anything entertaining. In an attempt to sate my own ego, I'm going to give you all a homework assignment to help spread my message of dissatisfaction to the population at large.

Step 1: Go find someone.
Someone, anyone. It doesn't even have to be someone you know. I don't care if its the annoying over-weight WASP baby-factory standing in front of you at Starbucks who's taking forever to order a venti mocha-frappe bullshit with low-fat chocolate chunks. The nearest convinient human being will do.

Step 2: Introduce yourself.
This step is pretty simple. Take a deep breath, focus on not diluting your thought process with thoughts of the latest celebrity break-ups, try really hard to remember your own name, and inform your subject of who they're dealing with.

Step 3: Deliver the reality-check they so richly deserve.
This is the step that really counts; I encourage you to get creative with this one. My favorite is to remind people that their failings are their own responsibility. Remind them that if they could find it in themselves to stop letting television raise their children, or spend a little less time fretting over  who [Random Starlet] is fucking this week; they might acctually be able to make some sort of positive impact on their lives. Go ahead an pour it on. It feels great and its a great way to kill time.

Step 4: Tell them Generally Disgruntled sent you.
This step is mostly for my own gratification. Its not entirely necessary, but I'd sure appreciate it. If they have any sort of half-contrived rebuttal; just give them my url. ( http://generallydisgruntled.blogspot.com/) I'll happily take the heat for you. Your welcome.

Step 5: Thank them for their time.
It costs nothing to be polite.

Step 6: Walk away with the satisfaction of a job well done.
Go ahead an enjoy the afterglow. You earned it.


Now the ball's in your court. You may choose to ignore this assignment all together; as is your right to do so. That being the case you might've found my blog on accident. That being so, you might find this a bit more your speed. (http://www.celebritypop.com/2012/06/15/jessica-simpsons-struggling-to-lose-weight-cant-lose-a-pound/)

If you decide to take on the mantle of international truth-saying sex symbol; congratulations! You're taking your first steps into a better world and I hope you get laid for it. Once you've completed your quest, please tell me about your achievement in the comments below.


There are alot of fish in the sea. Most of them are idiots and need to be reminded of such. That's just the way I feel about it. If you don't like it, get fucked.

1 comment:

  1. Apparently telling over make upped girls that they are lovely without the products (and the grocery store is a ridiculous place for that kind of frippery) is met with scorn then a glimmer of pensiveness then more scorn.
    I walked away with more snacks than satisfaction, but it's a little hard to achieve a job well done on an empty stomach.
    Seen as how I'm your fiance the only laid I'm getting is a little far away... rain check?

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